Ok, writing out my day Here.
An interesting experience happened at work today. This morning as we turned the horses out to their stables I was walking this one horse through this section where there was a cord which the horse and I required to walk over on the way to the stable.
I noticed the cord the day before and saw that it was definitely a hazard which would cause problems if a horse where to get tangled in it.
It simply was a basic point which was not being directed which create an unsafe environment for the animals.
I mean they are quite relaxed on the farm with regards to the care of the horse which is cool in one respect though this also turn into a form a abuse where points within the environment are being neglected. So a point for myself here to see the difference between “being relaxed” and “neglecting ones surroundings” and simply to not accept and allow a merging of the two points where “being relaxed” actually become overlooked for what it is really standing as. Meaning when this turns into a form of neglect must be stopped and not accepted or allowed. Clarity and Specificity are required Here. And are required within this world to actually push ourselves to move towards a more effective human.
Anyways I saw this “cord point” but did not fix it as we were busy with other things, as well as the fact that “ I am new” and have no right to say what I think should be done (self defined belief). Now what I mean by this, is I noticed this point coming up within myself quite a bit where because I am simply learning how everything thing works their, that I can simply not assume that things should be this way or that if I do not have the entire picture. But have noticed many points coming up within regards to points within the environment which are simply not being considered from the perspective of actually creating a safe environment for the animals. Yes the animals are smart and are capable of looking out from themselves, however one of these points which I in a way “allowed within the environment under the idea that I am “still new and is better to not suggest or say anything” actually today caused quite a disturbance.
As I walked the horse through the area where the cord was, only seconds before I attempted to adjust the cord temporarily so that it would not get hooked up with the horse…as I walked the horse over the cord, sure enough his foot caught the edge of the cord and spooked the horse a bit, then the cord got even more hooked up in the legs of the horse and he totally freaked, and reared up, and then proceeded to drag me around 6 or 8 feet as I simply slid across the gravel on my shoes attempted to stabilize the horse, after a few moments of frantic flailing about the horse settled down, breathing heavily through his nose afterwards he walked with me to his stable and I let him in. This could have been avoided and basically by allowing this cord point I also tacitly allowed and supported this experience that the horse when through, not actually considering the implications that this have on the horse, other possible outflows/consequences of such neglect
So this was an interesting point because here was a practical point which I saw in the environment which is “not cool” for the horses, yet I let it slide, I did not take responsibility for the point but rather, allowed the responsibility to be abdicated to “those in charge” like a kind of “this is their stable, who am I to tell them how to go about it” And the result was a completely unnecessary experience which could have actually injured myself or the horse.
This event illustrating still How I am simply allowing the current system in place to be the dominant system and am not yet standing up as an authority and taking responsibility for what is here.
So here I see that I am still holding back in actually expressing points and taking responsibility for points which I see, and simply standing by the fact that it is not acceptable anymore within this reality to allow such points.
Abuse has become so accepted in our world that we do not even realize anymore that we are abusing. And so I see this point as well, where its not a matter of who is right or wrong, and I to judge is unacceptable from the perspective of seeing many points that must be directed – I mean a few years ago I would not have even noticed and actually this kind of consideration had to be pointed out to me also, so understand how these points can simply not be seen as “important” by beings in this world.
So a re-education process is required.
So the environment is quite cool actually to be able to express myself within practically directing myself to create a safe, stable environment for the Animals. But just wanted to write about that one point which occurred today.
So I have had many of these experiences so far of really at this point, allowing myself to be shown how they do things, even if it is not necessarily how I would do it from the perspective of ensuring the point is directed absolute, but I will compromise myself within these moments and “let it slide” because that’s what they do, and I mean who am I to change things.
This is exactly the point I was writing about a few posts ago about accepting and status quo and just going with what is the established way of doing things, and in a way being to afraid to actually challenge the status quo out of fear of causing friction.
I mean overall the place is pretty cool, it is simply just in some moments there are points not being considered which I can see, so its cool, I simply have the opportunity to bring these points into awareness just the same as they were done for me.
But obviously not to wait on this because today’s experience with the horse showed me that these points that I am seeing are in fact valid.
So from this perspective “give to another what I would want to receive”
And explore the point of equality and how I can bring this point to the table so to speak in way which is not being considered.
It will be a long process because fuck, these horses are in small little pens with no grass, some are in nice big field but also some small pens
I wouldn’t want to live in those pens.
Pretty Cool though to see how an equal money system will actually free the animals so to speak, where the conditions where animals lived will no longer be based on making money so will not have to be subjected to these bull shit conditions of enslavement imposed upon them from an ignorant inconsiderate humanity, that see animals as for there own personal gains, not as equals to be treated as such and be free in the exact same way as humans.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give permission to this system of abuse that is currently here have president and authority simply because it is here.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to actually stand up for life and what is best for all and actually start to walk this process within my immediate environment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support this current system of abuse and self interest instead of what is best for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear standing up and saying something out of fear of friction.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I will be met with resistance and not then know what to say.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold back in speaking out of fear of being yelled at or argued with where in my point will not be herd and I will end up feeling embarrassed.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed fear to be my god, my authority, and that which I use to direct the choices and decisions I make and words I speak and do not speak.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to simply merge into what is here as this current system instead of actually standing up and not more accepting and allowing myself to “go along with it” because I do not want to “disrupt or upset” someones world.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider other peoples worlds from the perspective of not wanting to cause ripples in other peoples perfect worlds, even if those worlds are not what is best for all. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support self interest instead of what is best for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to simply go along with this world, out of fear of setting off other peoples egos.